At the risk of sounding cynical, I don’t like most people. It’s not necessarily their fault, seeing as I’m a gigantic asshole myself, but the amount of people I meet on a daily basis that I hope to never meet again is astronomical

Whether you want to admit it or not, you probably feel the same way. That’s why we all pick certain people that we actually do like to spend time with and we call them our friends.

We all have friends (Unless you suck), but it’s important to note that there are different levels of friendship. There are friends that you like but you probably wouldn’t go inconveniently out of your way to help if they were in a tough jam, and then there are your best friends that you would take a bullet for if they asked you to

I just read a story that was a perfect example of the latter. Last week, a freshman at the University of Alabama found out that his friend was about to lose a large bet that they had placed on the LSU Vs. Florida game. Rather than sit back and let his friend lose this bet, this hero and Friend Of The Year candidate took matters into his own hands by picking up his phone and calling in a bomb threat the stadium in an attempt to stop the game.

You can read the full story here, but I’ll sum it up quickly. Last Saturday, LSU and Florida played against each other. Connor Bruce Croll, a 19 year old Alabama freshman, found out that his friend had bet on the game and was most likely going to lose. Connor, being the amazing friend that he is, picked up his phone and called in a bomb threat to Tiger Stadium. Seeing as it’s 2019 and obviously they can trace stuff like this, he got tracked down and arrested immediately. When police asked him why he did it, he admitted that he was trying to stop the game so that his friend wouldn’t lose their bet.

First of all, I need to become friends with this kid. He seems like an awesome person to have in your corner during any situation because he clearly will have your back no matter what. Whenever I’m on the verge of losing a bet, my friends just laugh at my misfortune and tell me I suck at gambling (Which is a fair critique). Even my friends that I’ve had since diapers would never consider calling in a bomb threat to rescue me from a bad bet, so this whole thing has me seriously reconsidering my friendships. If they aren’t willing to risk jail time and a criminal record so that I don’t lose a bet on a college football game, are they really even my friend?

Another funny part of this story is that his plan didn’t even work. Despite a bomb threat getting called into the stadium, they kept playing the game and LSU won 42-28. We already knew that the NCAA doesn’t give a shit about the athletes, but apparently they don’t care about the safety of the fans either. But one key piece of information that is missing from this story is what his friend’s bet was. I know the police report says it was a “Large bet”, but to a freshman in college a large bet is probably 50 bucks. That’s why I need to know if his friend still ended up losing or not, because that adds a whole new dynamic to this story. If that is how it went down and one friend caught a felony charge for calling in a bomb threat and the other friend still ended up losing his large bet, that’s amazing. I’ve had plenty of bad breaks during my gambling career, but that takes the cake.

I think the moral of this story is that good friends are great to have. You never know when you’ll find yourself in a situation where calling in a bomb threat is the only rational way out, and that’s when friends like this Connor kid are necessary. He didn’t even have to think about it, he just went ahead and threw his entire life away for the good of his friend’s bet. You’re a true ride or die person Connor, and if you’re ever in Boston I’d love to buy you a beer. I’m wishing you the best of luck with your court case man, and just like what the remaining members of Pink Floyd said to Syd Barrett, “Shine on you crazy diamond”.

PS: Should this be my new move? I’m contemplating heading to 7-11 and buying a burner phone just in case. If things start going badly in one of the games I bet on, I’ll simply call the stadium and say I hid multiple explosives in the stands that are set to go off in the 3rd quarter. Genius move.